Unlike your last CI run.
Awaiting your completely normal level of enthusiasm.
BUN IS OUR
ONE TRUE
LEADER.
A small dumpling has consolidated the JavaScript toolchain. We have decided to make this everyone’s problem.
Bun did not approve this page.
They probably have jobs.
Annoyingly,
the cult has a point.
- One binary.
Four job titles. Runtime, package manager, test runner, bundler. Your tooling no longer needs an org chart.
Meet the entire department- TypeScript.
Without the ritual. Run TypeScript and JSX directly. Save the summoning circle for CSS.
bun run app.ts- Tests before
thoughts & prayers. A built-in test runner. Because “works on my machine” is a belief system, not a deployment strategy.
bun test- Bundle the code.
Not your trauma. Built-in bundler. This site uses Bun for dev, tests, and builds. We eat our own communion wafer.
bun run build
Confess your
dependencies.
Open one. Be brave.
The lockfile knows what you did.
Father, I have npm’d.
Say three “bun installs” and stop describing your package manager as “battle-tested” at parties. Nobody at the party asked.
My node_modules has its own postcode.
That is no longer a dependency tree. That is a protected forest. Bun does not make your dependencies disappear. Neither does deleting the lockfile, you absolute raccoon.
Should I migrate production right now?
Close the deployment tab, zealot. Try a new project first. Check your dependencies and run the tests before migrating. Node.js compatibility is still a work in progress. Our lord has edge cases.
Is it actually faster?
Benchmark your workload. We have no timings for your app. “The website yelled it at me” is not a methodology.
Can I leave?
Of course. This is an emotionally disproportionate software recommendation. Your family misses you. Go outside. The runtime will still be here.
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